Cartoon by Seyran Caferli

FIFA awards Trump a free kick

By Martin McKenzie-Murray

The Saturday Paper: Perhaps the only surprise about the gauche, clumsy and extravagantly long FIFA World Cup draw last week was that it occurred in Washington, DC’s Kennedy Center and not Trump International Hotel Las Vegas. To have held it in the bright and shameless city would have perfectly complemented an occasion principally given not to the draw of next year’s tournament but to the flattery of the United States president.
The 2026 men’s World Cup will begin in June and be played across the bordering countries of Mexico, Canada and the US, but such was the sycophancy shown to Donald Trump by FIFA that evening, the host status of America’s neighbours might’ve been lost on a casual observer. In fact, earlier this year, FIFA became a tenant of the US president when it established an office in Trump Tower in New York City.

An exceptionally generous person may conclude that FIFA president Gianni Infantino’s servility to the US president is but the practical acknowledgement of flattery’s effectiveness on Trump – and that to service his pathological appetite for it is simply one way of immunising oneself against his rages.

This would be very generous indeed. Infantino’s flattery, expressed by a man who leads an organisation even more notorious for graft and dubious patronage than Trump’s own businesses, long ago acquired a gratuitous quality. So much so, that the former head of FIFA’s ethics committee says he’s guilty of breaching the organisation’s requirement of political neutrality.

It’s easy to see why. In October, the day before the Nobel Committee awarded its peace prize to the Venezuelan opposition leader, Infantino posted to social media: “President Donald J. Trump definitely deserves the Nobel Peace Prize for his decisive actions.”

In November, while speaking at the American Business Forum in Miami, Infantino described Trump as a close friend. “He does what he says,” Infantino said. “He says what he thinks. He actually says what many people think as well, but maybe don’t dare to say, and that’s why he’s so successful. I have to say it: I’m a bit surprised sometimes when we read some negative comments [about him] … So I think we should all support what he’s doing because I think it’s looking pretty good.”

Apparently sharing Trump’s disappointment that he didn’t win the Nobel Peace Prize, or perhaps just seeing an opportunity to soothe Trump’s pain at losing, Infantino recently confected a FIFA Peace Prize to be awarded at the draw.

The prize was created without the consultation of the FIFA board, much less its congress of 221 members. Its judges (if the plural is indeed even appropriate here) and their criteria remain unclear. The prize is utterly mysterious – that is, except for the identity of its recipient, whom Infantino had hinted weeks before would be Trump.

And so it was. “This is your peace prize!” Infantino said as he shook Trump’s hand, bestowed a medallion and then conferred the ghastly trophy. It is a golden ball/globe, underneath which are several hands reaching toward it, presumably a representation of the world held in the hands of some fine and peaceable leaders, but which reminded me of cherished things being throttled by grasping sycophants like Infantino.

The laurelling of Trump still not done, a video played: “Peace creates hope and football translates that hope into unity,” it said. “We honour a dynamic leader who has engaged in diplomatic efforts that create opportunities for dialogue, de-escalation and stability and who has championed the unifying power of football on the world stage.”

I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating: fuck FIFA. This is an organisation that has yielded more corruption than many crime families; an organisation typically run by the acme of personality disorders. Unctuous, shameless and conveniently servile men whose distribution of billions in revenue has been only slightly less mysterious than the judging criteria for its peace prize.

In May, to mark the 10th anniversary of Swiss police, in cooperation with the US State Department, arresting seven FIFA executives on charges of corruption – an investigation that resulted in 50 related arrests – the group FairSquare released a statement on FIFA governance signed by dozens of academics, authors and whistleblowers.

The group, a non-profit organisation registered in London but comprising various human rights researchers and lawyers from around the world, said: “It is time to recognise that these reforms have failed to usher in a new era of responsible governance at FIFA and that the organisation is structurally unfit to govern world football. FIFA is arguably more poorly governed today than it was 10 years ago.

“The reason for this failure is that the reforms that began in 2016 did not address the key structural flaws at the root of many of FIFA’s governance problems, most notably the deeply problematic power dynamic between the organisation’s executive branch and its member associations. FIFA redistributes a large proportion of the revenue it generates to its member associations and confederations. There is little verifiable evidence to show that the primary impact of this redistribution has been the development of the game, and considerable evidence to suggest its main purpose has been to ensure the loyalty and allegiance of member associations. The power of its most senior and powerful officials is rooted in this model of patronage, which disincentivises ethical conduct and precludes effective internal reform.”

The world game doesn’t need rent seekers to promote itself, nor does it require administrators who’ve mistaken themselves for gods to enhance soccer’s romanticism. If we can put aside the decades of flagrant corruption, this might be my prevailing point of disgust with FIFA: never is there a sense of humble custodianship. Instead, we receive the odious platitudes of fevered egos – self-absorbed cretins whose defining feature is their attraction to power and glamour.

I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating: fuck FIFA >>>