You see! “Perpetual mourning” is not the only issue we’re dealing with. Of course, as we know by now, our Muslim, Jewish, Baha’i and Mormon sisters and brothers have no problem marrying or going to bed with their physically contaminated coffee-drinking and swine-eating partners. 

GR

Would you take the Job of Becoming Trump's Chief of staff?

I would love to get a job as an Iran advisor, instead. But as long as John Bolton is there I won’t get hired. You see, during a job interview about two years ago, I called Bolton a “lefty.” And he is still upset with me.