In the past couple of weeks, the Iranian opposition figures in the US have come on TV and have asked the Trump administration to use US satellite technology and military satellites to provide free internet access to the Iranian protesters. This would really help us since the IR Regime has blocked certain social media sites and has slowed down the internet to create obstacles for protestors uploading video clips.
On the surface it sounds like a reasonable request. Satellite TV’s are widely used in Iran and the Trump Administration has stated many times that it supports the Iranian protestors. However there are several serious problems standing in the way of making this request a reality. First of all, you need to have many satellites blanketing the space above Iran to meet the large coverage area and the high capacity requirements of this request. Such satellite network does not exist today and needs to be built.
Secondly, the satellite dish infrastructure in Iran is for receiving TV programs, like Turkish Soap Operas and cannot be used for the transmit and receive requirements of the internet access to upload and download information. If one was to equip his home for satellite internet, provided that there’s a satellite network above, he has to buy a transmit/receive dish to put on the roof and a modem next to his computer, at the cost of $400-500.
But let’s not lose hope and see what we can do by making the following proposal to Trump.
Ok, if Trump issues an Executive Order to General “Mad Dog” Mattis telling him to give us all the military satellites that are sitting around the Pentagon, we can then go to Elon Musk of Space X and Tesla and have him support us in launching and positioning the satellites in low orbit over Iran. And that should take care of the satellite network requirement.
We will then go to Anousheh Ansari who has a communications company and lots of money and task her to buy/build us a few million satellite dishes and modems that will be needed in each household. We will ask Firouz Naderi of NASA to be the Project Manager of this significant undertaking, which he will surely accept since he is retired and has plenty of time on his hand. The only other thing left to do is to assign an Executive Sponsor to the project that can swiftly solve problems and remove obstacles. I was thinking of Jared Kushner first, but he is going to be busy with Robert Mueller regarding money laundering for the Russians. So let’s go with General Mattis. This should be it for this side of the ocean.
Now, we need to get all this equipment to Iran and into a big warehouse. So who’s qualified to smuggle stuff into Iran without paying customs, has cargo ships and private ports in Bandar Abbas? That would be Sepah. But Sepah is under sanctions by Trump. Ok, we will ask Trump to issue a second Executive Order giving a one-time waiver to Sepah to send its cargo ship to Houston, load the equipment, take them to Bandar Abbas and warehouse them at Parchin.
The last piece of the puzzle is to find an installation company that can sell and install the dishes and modems at the protestors’ homes. That is actually already in place and is the same Sepah-affiliated outfit that currently sells and installs the “illegal” satellite TV dishes throughout Iran. We will also make Ahmadinejad the Project Manager for that side of the ocean and he will surely accept since he has plenty of time on his hand and is eager to do something. And finally, Ghasem Soleimani will be the Executive Sponsor since Iraq and Syria are relatively quiet and he needs something to do.
For the project kick-off meeting, I believe that Trump’s Mar-e-Lago resort in Florida is ideal. Trump is always there. The weather is nice this time of the year, and Disney World is nearby.
I think we are all good to go if Trump would only lift the visa ban and allow Ahmadi and Soleimani to come to Florida!